She Got My Back


Both those statements represent Ty and I well. We actually are that close. lol. No, neither of us has yelled out “I love you” in a crowded hall, but if I felt that Ty was having a bad day and needed to hear it, I would. I also know that she would do the same. We are there for each other. That we can count on.

In this entry I’m going to tell you guys a little about our friendship. Ty hasn’t gotten around to making a blog post yet so I’m using this post to introduce her a little. I’m fairly sure that I know Ty well enough that I could make a post on her behalf, but that would probably piss her off. She’s a grown woman and she can speak for herself.

We are both in our early thirties. Actually I won’t be 30 until next month, but I figure that it’s close enough that I can claim it. Ty is a couple of years older than me although there are times when she acts much older than that. (She’ll probably kill me for making that statement, but it’s true.)

I am a biracial female with an asian mother and a black father. Ty calls me blasian for short. Ty is a very down to earth white girl who got soul. She likes to joke that she is blacker than I am and it some cases that may very well be true. I mean look at her name, Tywanda, where the hell did that come from? Of course my name is no better. Bobbie Jo isn’t my real name it’s actually more complicated and I rarely use it. My dad started calling me Bobbie Jo when I was a baby and the name has stuck.

I am not saying that Ty is a white girl trying to be black. If you knew her you would now that this is not the case. And I am not a black girl trying to be white. I am who I am and don’t feel that I need to validate myself to anyone. So this is an inside joke between us. It may come up a few times during our postings. But I am not your stereotypical black girl, but in my experience few black women are. Life is not as you see it in a movie or a tv show (although there are times that my life can be classified as a soap opera).

I’ve already posted a bit about my relationship history. Never married (thank goodness) with two children, a daughter and a son. Ty has been married for about 11 years now, I think, and she has a young daughter. We both love being mothers and will do anything for our children, even stay in a bad relationship. I am currently single and trying to figure out this dating thing. Ty is in the process of re-evaluating her marriage. She may call it something different, but I’ll leave it to her to tell you.

We are both fairly successful women, at least in regards to our careers. We both work in the legal industry, but neither of us are lawyers. Ty may one day become one. She is in school working on that now. We work for different agencies/firms but are located in the same building different floors. We visit each other often, but not too often. We do have work to do.

We spend a lot of time together, if not in person via technology. Our children spend a lot of time together as well. We keep each other up to date on the goings on of our love lives, if you want to call it that. We go through a personal crisis at least once a week. So let’s say I’m just enjoying a day out with a possible love interest and Ty calls. I answer the phone. She’s fairly up to date on my plans and would not call unless it was an emergency. Please note that our emergencies may not be considered an emergency by others. If Ty says that she needs me then the date is over, plain and simple. We don’t cry emergency unless we mean it.

Guys have gotten upset about our friendship. If they can’t get over it then they aren’t the one for me. How can someone expect me to turn my back on the one person I know will be there for me when I need them? We’re just friends boys, not competition.

Yes, there have been times that we have had to clarify that we were not lesbians. I’m sure that this is true for many best friends. We are not touchy feely. Actually we rarely have reason to touch each other. I’m not a hugger, except with a man, and neither is she. I held her hand once, and that was while she was getting a tattoo. I’ve had no desire to hold her hand again. No offense, Ty.

Threesomes are a Hell No. If you are part of my life in any way you know that Ty is my bff. But when it comes to the bedroom activities she will never be a part of that. In the past 8 months I have had at least 4 guys ask me if I was into threesomes. No, I am not. And the next questions would be “What if it was with Ty?” No, hell no.

So in a nutshell that is our friendship. Truly the best of friends and nothing more. When you find that special someone you can talk to about anything you don’t let them go. Now, if I could just get a similar bond with a man and some serious physical/sexual attraction thrown in, I would be good.


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